Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Questions and Concerns

Obviously, doing a home birth has proven to be very different from doing a hospital birth as there are many decisions that have to be made, some that were obvious and others that have come up along the way. Here are two of the bigger decisions that I have had to recently make.

One of the biggest things I've been wondering about since the time we found out that we were having another boy, was how he would be circumcised, since the hospital usually does it while the baby is still admitted. I had an appointment with my midwife yesterday, and I asked her that question. She gave me the name of a Jewish doctor who will come to your home and perform the circumcision! I spoke with him today, and I found out that not only will he come to my home, but he also waits 8 days after the baby is born so that the body will naturally produce Vitamin K, that way we won't have to give him the Vitamin K shot to make his blood clot. This may not sound like a big deal, but I'm really trying to do things differently and healthier with Quentin, and if I can wait an extra week for his body to naturally produce the Vitamin, then why not let his body do what it needs to do?
Click here to view Dr. Miller's website, where he gives some more information regarding the circumcision.

The next big concern and decision I had to make was whether to rent or buy a birthing tub, since my goal is to have a water birth. There are a few tubs on the market, and I've found that the main thing to look for when purchasing a tub is to ensure that your back will be submerged in an effort to maximize pain relief.
I called the midwifery office and they suggested the La Bassine ® Water Birth Pool, which is what I ended up purchasing from YourWaterBirth.com
Click here to view the tub.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Building a New Life

Six years ago yesterday, I gave my heart to my hero. We stood in an old, brick, country church alongside our friends and family as we made vows that we honored, until death did us part. Half of my heart is gone, there is an emptiness in my life. An emptiness that is becoming so much more real now that I'm having to build a new life, without him. For almost 8 years (including my time in the Marine Corps), I have been told where to go and what to do by the Marine Corps, and now, I'm being forced to start a new life, without the Corps. When I was in, I so badly wanted out so I could be home with our son, Tyson. And now that I am far from my "other" family, I miss the life more than ever. Those who stood beside me, and those who stood beside my husband - even as he laid there dying - and their families, are now intertwined deeper into my life than I ever thought was possible.

I find, as holidays pass and Quentin is about to be born, that l have to build OUR new life, one that I never thought I would make. So many decisions that I have to make now, alone. One of the worst parts of settling down is that I'm no longer busy all of the time. I am getting new friends, but I miss those I already have, in California. I miss my love, having someone to share my deepest thoughts and feelings with, the companionship. I don't want to make anyone mad, I want to make everyone happy in the way that I raise my boys, but it's all part of finding my way, making my own decisions as I have to.

I am thankful for my home, our home. The Lord has blessed us with a safe haven, but I have to say that I don't have the motivation to do anything here yet. Maybe it's that I'm 9 days from my due date, maybe it's that I don't want to have to feel the pain of sorting through his clothes, and finding his old shampoo and conditioner while unpacking and not wanting to throw it away, like he's going to use it again? Who saves shampoo and conditioner? …………… Widows do.